Huck Finn Comes to the Twentieth Century
by Pico the Great
Summary: Just what the title says. The names have been changed to protect the innocent.


CRASH!  
Something had fallen in my closet. At least, that's what it had sounded like. But the door was closed, and there was no one else in the room. I put a marker in my book and walked over to the closet, stepping around my backpack. Sounds were now issuing from behind the closed door, including a selection of archaic semi-curse words. I opened the door. "What the..."  
There was a boy there; about fourteen, with mousy hair and a long face. He was dressed in shirt and trousers and, had he been standing up, would've been about my height. "Uh...h'lo."  
I had to be dreaming. That was it. It was only a dream that it was six twenty-four in the morning, five minutes til I had to leave for my bus stop, and that a fourteen-year-old child had just fallen into my closet from, I don't know, an inter-dimensional portal. I stepped to the side and stubbed my toe on my backpack. "Alright, definitely not a dream," I muttered. "Then who the hell are you?"  
"Umm...uh, George Peters." He looked away.  
"Or not. C'mon, what's your real name?"  
The kid looked surprised at being found out, but volunteered the information. "George Jackson. That's my real name, miss, honest injun it is!"  
"Oh really. Well, George," an idea pinged on in my head. I stopped and gathered my papers to account for the pause, then followed up, "so how's Tom Sawyer doing?"  
"'E's 'most well, miss, though that bullet hurt him considerable bad."  
I straightened up, dropping the papers. "I knew it! You're Huckleberry Finn!"  
Huck gaped. "Why, blame it, how'd y' catch on?"  
I grinned, then rolled my eyes. "You make it kinda obvious." He looked puzzled. "It also helps that I've been reading the book the last couple of weeks in English." I pulled Huckleberry Finn out of my backpack and handed it to him. Huck stared at it and started flipping through. Just then I heard my father's footsteps in the hall. I pointed to Huck. "Stay there, kid, and don't move." My closet was hidden from the door by a bookcase, and I didn't want to have to bother to explain now and risk missing the bus.  
"(my name here)," my father poked his head in. "C'mon, six-thirty, time to go."  
"Coming." I glanced at Huck, and he looked up from the book. I made a quick decision. "Alright, kid, you're coming with me to school. I donno where else you can go, and I can't leave you here alone." I tossed my book in my backpack, put Huck Finn (the book) in next to it, and went to put on my shoes.  
  
I got Huck out of the house without mishap (door slams: "just checking the weather outside.") and we were now making our way to the corner of (street) and (street). Christopher was thirty paces ahead, oblivious to everything but his new CD player. I addressed Huck. "M'k, now, listen up. There's a couple things you'll have to know if you're coming with me. First and foremost: the n-word. Do not say the n-word anywhere around school. In fact, not around people in general."  
"What n-word?"  
"I'm not gonna say it. Neither are you. Got that?"  
"Well, why cain't I–"  
"It's rude. It might not've been rude in your time, but nowadays it's socially unacceptable."  
"What're y' talkin' about my time? Ain't it th' same?"  
I was afraid we'd get to this. "Um. Well. You probably won't like hearing this, so don't go freaking out on me now." I waited for his nod. "You are here in Vienna, Virginia, 120 years after your book is set. I'm not certain how you got here. And I don't know how to get you back."  
Huck stared. Crap, I thought. He's going to freak out, and I am not good with sympathy. "Sorry kid." Huck kept staring, then finally opened his mouth.  
"'s that it?" I assented. "Shucks, I thought ye were gonna tell me someone'd died 'r somthin'. Y'got me all worried for nothin'." And he stuck his fists in his pockets and started whistling.  
"You're taking it better than I thought," I remarked dryly.  
"Why, blame it, there didn't anythin' bad happen, did it?"  
"No, not if you consider being blasted out of your home into a different time period with no conceivable means of getting back a good thing. And forget time period; you're a fictional character! By rights you do not exist in the real world! No offense meant, I'm sure."  
Hands still in his pockets, Huck shrugged. "Ain't no problem by me. I was figgerin' t' light out fer th' territories anyhow, but y' stopped me th' bother. I got here without any trouble at all, didn' I?"  
"Mm-hmm. Oh yeah, the second thing. I know you don't like being civilized, but around here, people don't shoot squirrels. So, you know, no traps, or squirrel soup, or little pelts lying around. Sound good?"  
"Uh-huh."  
He was looking at something on a porch railing. I followed his gaze, and added, "that goes double for housecats."  
"Shucks."  
  
We arrived at school at six fifty-seven. Kelly was not on the bus; a good thing, since I was now spared explanation. People didn't pay too much attention to the extra kid on the bus, but they became more aware after we entered the library and Huck started staring around. "Oh, lordy," he breathed. "I ain't never seen so many books!"  
I figured it would be harmless to let him wander around til the bell rang, so I went to talk with my friends. Jessica was in a blue funk, as usual, Lauren was cheerful, and Diana was half asleep and doing her french homework. "Hey people!"  
Jess's mood did a one-eighty. "Hi!" she and Lauren said cheerfully. Diana muttered something about killing anyone who stole her homework. Just then, Huck came up behind me. I turned to include him. "People, that's Huck Finn." I pointed at him. Huck took a step back. Everyone stared, then Lauren waved. "Hello."  
Huck did not seem to like this much attention, and became a bit surly. "H'lo yourself, an' see how y' like it."  
Diana raised her head. "Huckleberry Finn?" I nodded. "I'm sure," she said sarcastically, and returned to her work.  
"You didn't have any coffee this morning, did you?"  
Meanwhile, Jessica was greeting Huck. "Hi!"  
"H'lo."  
"Hi!"  
"H'lo."  
"Hi!"  
"Um..."  
"Don't worry, it takes a while to get used to them," I said to him, earning a punch from Jessica. I stepped backwards and avoided it. The warning bell rang, and we started gathering our belongings, except for Huck, who didn't have any belongings to gather, and, consequently, stood there watching. "Shit," said Diana.  
"Why?"  
"I didn' finish," she returned. "Now I've gotta put up with Flinn's b-----n' at me about not getting it done."  
"Why didn't you do it last night?" asked Lauren. Bad move, I thought.  
Diana turned, and I could see her gearing up for a grand-mal sarcastic outburst. "Hmmm, let's see," she said, counting on her fingers, "I had to finish Sharp's project last night, and I had English vocab, plus my brother parked his stupid car in a ditch on the way home, and he wouldn' let me get out and walk. It takes me, like, twenty minutes to walk home, but instead, I had t' wait thirty, while he called the stupid tow truck."  
"And now we're gonna be late to class," I added under my breath.  
"Psht. Like I care anymore."  
I pulled a chocolate out of my lunchbox. "Here. Take this, or you'll be like that all day." Diana grumbled but took the chocolate. "Oooh! Can I have one too?" Jessica stuck out her hand. I looked in the lunchbox.  
"I don't have any more with me, but you can come and have locker candy."  
"Whassat?" asked Huck from my other side. I'd forgotten about him. "C'mon," I gestured. When we arrived at my locker, I let them root through the large tupperware container of candy I kept there while I hung up my jacket and lunchbox. The bell rang as I closed the door, and now I was the one cursing while Huck looked on in admiration.  
  
We arrived at Psychology at the end of the Moment of Silence. The door was locked, of course, and I knocked waited impatiently. Mr. Young opened the door and stood aside for us to enter. "Terrorists." He noticed Huck. "And just who might you be?"  
"I'm...." Huck began to lie, but caught my glance. "I'm Huck Finn, sir."  
"Really. And you're visiting with her?"  
"Yessir."  
"Do you have a note for him?" Mr. Young asked me.  
"Umm...It's in the office." I waited, hoping he'd swallow it. Mr. Young studied us for a moment then said, "Oh, just sit down. (My name here), go read your comics." I grinned.  
  
At the end of Psychology, I stepped to the side of the hall to talk to Huck. "Hey kid, d'you know anything about French?"  
"I reckon I know a bit. I got some o' their jabber out'n a book, oncet. I disremember what book."  
"D'you want to sit in on my French class? Or d'you want to go t' the library instead?"  
Huck thought a bit, and finally chose the library. On the way there, he told me how weird my time was. "An' all these girls, they're all wearin' slacks an' trousers! Even you! If it ain't th' beatenest thing I ever saw... Cuz that Becky, th' one Tom's sweet on, she's always wearin' those calicos an' dresses."  
I shrugged and we entered the library. Mrs. T. looked up from the desk and smiled. I pointed her out. "That's one of the Librarians. She can help you find whatever book you want." Huck nodded absently and approached the desk. "H'lo."  
"Hi. Do you need something?"  
"Yes'm. I'd like t' know a book by...by Mr. Mark Twain."  
"Why sure. And what is your name, by the way?"  
"Me? My name's Huck Finn, mum." The bell rang. I saw the Librarian's eyes widen slightly as I left the room.  
  
I returned at lunch. Huck was sitting at the back table, feet on the back of a chair beside him, flipping through the Dictionary of Superstitions. Expanding his repertoire, I thought, and grinned. The table around him was filled with books of all types, from histories to atlases to fiction to fantasy. One was open to Hamlet's soliloquy. Another was a history of Henry VIII, and one more, I noticed, was a French workbook. "Having a grand old time, aren't you?" Huck started up, then grinned and nodded. "I just came to ask if you wanted to stay here or go the Physics with me."  
"What's ...fisics?"  
"Physics. It's..." I gesticulated vaguely, "a science-math sort of thing. Big on the math."  
"Oh," Huck leaned back again. "Well, I don' take no stock in mathematics."  
"Yes, I thought so."  
"I don' take stock in no science, nuther."  
"What do you take stock in?" I muttered. "Alright, so you're not coming to Physics with me. I'll be back at twelve-thirty, so you can do as you want until then. Within limits."  
  
I returned at the end of Physics. Huck was grinning ear to ear. Ms. T. gave us a dazed wave as we left, and I smiled and waved back. "Alright," I asked, once we were out in the hall. "What did you do?"  
"It weren't nothin' bad, I promise!"  
"Tell me! And don't lie."  
"Well, I just tole 'er about about king Sollermun an' his cuttin' the baby in half, an' how Tom was pretendin' he was Sollermun, an' Betsy an' Betsy's friend were the women, an' there was a frog was th' baby. It warn't no happy frog."  
"That's disgusting!" I covered my grin.  
"Why, Tom wanted the baby t' be Missus Perkinsus dog at first, but I tole 'im since her mister was th' Judge Perkins, it warn't a good idea. 'Deed it warn't, says Tom, an' 'e finds a frog."  
We arrived at the English trailer as te bell rang, and dove inside. Mr. M had not returned from the building, so I wouldn't get in trouble with attendance. I told Huck to sit in the empty seat next to Winnie, the one cat-a-corner from mine. The class was mostly present, all talking and copying down the daily schedule. Rinny came bounding up the steps and in the door, followed by Shannon. Both took their seats.  
Rinny sat down and arranged her stuff as I finished writing the schedule. "Who's he?" She pointed to Huck with her pencil.  
"You're probably not going to believe me, but that's Huck Finn." Huck turned around on hearing his name.  
"No, you're right, I don't believe you."  
"It's true," I insisted, "he fell out of my closet."  
Wrong thing for me to have said. "Oh, really? How do you know he wasn't hiding in your closet in the first place? Do you keep small children in your closet?" I rolled my eyes.  
Huck looked at Rinny. "I ain't no chile. I'm fourteen."  
"Same thing." Rinny made a dismissive gesture. Mr. M walked in. He noticed the din, told the class to be quiet (which command the class ignored), went and dropped off a paper on his desk, then sat on the stool by the podium to take roll.  
"Now, today..." he started, then stopped and looked at Huck. "Who're you?"  
"My name's Huckleberry Finn, sir."  
"Is it now?" Mr. M finished taking roll and put the attendance sheet away. He turned his attention back to Huck. "Perhaps you'd like to tell us about your book, Huck Finn. Could you explain to us, for example, what you thought when the feud was going on between the Grangerfords and the Sheperdsons?"  
"I'd be right glad to. See, I's asked Buck why the feud was goin' on. He didn't have no straight answer, so I got to thinkin'. It wasn't right for them families to be shootin' an' killin' each other all th' time. An' I wondered if I sh'd run away. But that warn't right nuther. I–"  
The door opened again, and the class all looked toward it. A nervous- looking ninth-grader flitted in and deposited a note on the podium. Mr. M called afer him. "Hey! What's a freshman doing playing messenger? Go sign up for a class!" The kid emitted a slight grin and was gone.  
Mr. M picked up the note and glanced at it. He then stood and began pacing the trailer. "Thank you, Huck. Now, as I was saying, today I'm going to hand out the worksheet for the project you'll be doing on the book Huck Finn. You'll be bringing the main character into the twenty-first century, and seeing how he interacts with..." M dropped the note on Huck's desk. "...your friends, your teachers, and yourselves. As you can see, Miss (my name here) here has already done this, but since the project has not been officially assigned yet, she will receive no extra points."  
"Where's the office?" whispered Huck to me. I stood and asked to escort him to the office, and Mr. M assented. I opened the trailer door...  
...onto a river. It was enormous, brown with mud, and flowing sluggishly. The door opened onto one bank, a few feet distant from the water's edge. "Alright," I said to Huck, "I suppose that solves the problem of you getting home. Bye, kid, and have a nice life."  
Huck stepped out and waved, and I closed the door after him. I turned back to the class. Everyone stared at me. "You all saw what just happened, right?" A few people nodded. "And you don't find it the slightest bit strange?"  
"You see weird things when you're a teacher" said Mr. M. "Now sit down. Class doesn't let out for another hour."  
  
END 


End file.
